Urination ‘Spell’ Conjures Up Life Bans for 4 Soccer Players

Soccer officials in Zimbabwe banned four members of the army’s first division Tongogara side for life after they urinated in front of several thousand spectators at a stadium in eastern Zimbabwe Sunday.

Nelson Chirwa of the Zimbabwe Football Assn. said the players were practicing tribal witchcraft in an attempt to change their side’s fortunes. It was losing, 1-0.

“I would like to advise all football teams that next time they should go to a better witch doctor,” Chirwa said.

The Tongogara players probably agree. Their spell failed, 2-0.

Trivia time: What jockey won the first three runnings of the Hollywood Gold Cup?

Marching on their stomachs: San Francisco running back Roger Craig was on the bench in the fourth quarter of the 49ers’ 45-3 victory over the Atlanta Falcons after having rushed for nearly 100 yards. The 49er offensive linemen asked Coach George Seifert to put Craig back in the game; Craig has a deal with his linemen that if he gains more than 100 yards, he will buy them dinner. Craig finished with 109 yards.

Trivia answer: George Woolf, aboard Seabiscuit in 1938, Kayak II in 1939 and Challedon in 1940.

Rematch is off: Steve McCarthy has withdrawn from his rematch with Steve Wilson scheduled for tonight in Reading, England. McCarthy, who has the flu, was to have fought Tony Wilson in a rematch of their light-heavyweight fight in September that was halted when Wilson’s mother, Minna, climbed into the ring and hit McCarthy with a high-heeled shoe.

Quotebook: Chicago Bears Coach Mike Ditka, on the crowd-inciting antics of Green Bay Packers linebacker Tim Harris: “Sometimes, God gives you physical talent and takes away the brain.”