Over the years, the USC-UCLA game has...

Over the years, the USC-UCLA game has inspired such pranks as the defacing of each school’s mascots, the printing of fake notices canceling each other’s pep rallies and, in one case, an aerial fertilizer drop.

The rivalry this week is reflected in several anti-UCLA jibes sprinkled throughout 28th Street, an off-campus newspaper billed as USC’s “Voice of the Row.”

A section titled, “What They Say Vs. What They Mean,” includes such lines as:

“When your high school friend says, ‘I think UCLA has more to offer me than USC,’ she means, ‘Dad lost $10,000 in the stock market crash and can’t afford USC.”’

However, USC’s academic reputation wasn’t enhanced by one student who said his school was superior to UCLA because “I don’t think they (UCLA) have even won us twice over the past eight years.”

That’s a tough punch line to beaten.

Fantasy and reality in L.A.:

Tom Bratter of Palms points out that the exterior depicted as the home of the TV station in the series, “WIOU,” is the old Hollywood Citizen-News building.

Meanwhile, La Opinion, the Spanish-language daily, has moved into the Title Guaranty and Trust Building, which was the mythical headquarters of the “Los Angeles Tribune” in the TV show, “Lou Grant.”

And, of course, lots of non-newspaper scenes continue to be shot in the ornate lobby of the old L.A. Herald-Examiner building.

James Brodhead of Sherman Oaks has noticed a strange phenomenon associated with model homes. Many lack driveways. Yes, here in Freeway City. Instead, Brodhead pointed out, the garage doors are “blocked by lawns, pathways, flower beds.” Why? he asks.

The answer is that the garage is often used as an office by the salespeople.

There’s another factor, though we’re certain it’s a minor consideration. You’ll notice (in the accompanying photo) that the front yard looks quite a bit bigger without a driveway. And more attractive to would-be buyers.

Alas, once they’re sold, even model homes are required by law to add driveways.

Our note about the new “Only in Beverly Hills” newspaper column at Beverly Hills High started us wondering, for purely selfish reasons, about the origin of the phrase, “Only in L.A.”

It’s no doubt a regionalism derived from “Only in America,” a phrase that bore a rags-to-riches connotation.

“Only in L.A.,” of course, connotes oddballs and eccentrics. Our investigation is continuing, but we did find a mention in the the 1974 movie, “Chinatown.”

In one scene, detective Jake Gittes (Jack Nicholson) eyes a body in the morgue and mutters:

“Middle of a drought and the water commissioner drowns--only in L.A.”

From our file of Forgotten Traffic Solutions:

“Word has come from San Diego that the district attorney has determined that fast racing between L.A. and San Diego must stop,” the Auto Club’s Touring Topics reported in 1909.

“He is said to have deputized a number of farmers residing along the route . . . to keep a watchful eye on speeding motorists.”

Stupid Bureaucrat Tricks: Weeks after requesting a report from Sacramento, an L.A. City Council aide was told by a state official, “I’m sorry I haven’t done that work. I’ve been busy at productivity meetings.”

Speaking of stupid, on Wednesday we mistakenly called the late Wild Bill Davison a clarinetist. Bill Hux, Rockey Spicer and several other faithful fans of his called to say that Wild Bill was a cornetist.

miscelLAny:

At 1,017 feet in height, L.A.’s First Interstate Tower is the eighth tallest building in the world.