When Powell Became a Republican

A few observations from the floor of the Republican convention:

* Bob Dole’s approach to bringing women into government: If you’re female, don’t ask, don’t tell.

* Dole and Jack Kemp arrived by boat, the only way around Pat Buchanan’s wall.

* An X-ray machine at the convention was programmed to screen out anyone with a new idea.

* The invocation was led by the minister who baptized Newt Gingrich. (He was criticized at the time for not holding Newt under the water longer.)

* Dole’s triple threat--he hasn’t read the platform; he has private values; he won’t ever say what they are.

* Anyone can become vice president. It’s a chance you take being born here.

* Come to the hall early and you can see speakers rehearsing their speeches. Come very early and you can see delegates rehearsing their responses.

* You can create a small business by starting a large one.

* Heard on the floor: “He looks so good! Who is Strom Thurmond’s taxidermist?”

* When Colin Powell said, “We believe in the almighty. . . “ several delegates broke in to finish the thought: “dollar.”

* And, as Powell summed up Dole’s task: “To restore the American Dream . . . without awakening the American people if possible.”