Plane Crazy and Pressed to Make Sense: A Year of Folly

There was lots of news in the air in the travel world this year--notably numerous flying misadventures, as well as press releases that were full of hot air. A few favorites from staff and wire reports that skated across our desks and computer screens this year:

Flying Circus

First-class fracas: Surely one of the most celebrated incidents on an airline was in June, when televangelist Robert Schuller was accused of manhandling a United Airlines attendant who refused to remove cheese from his fruit-and-cheese plate in the first-class section. “I was shaken so hard that my head was going back and forth so many times, giving me whiplashes and pain,” claimed flight attendant Khaled Elabiad. Schuller gave a different account. He said he was just trying to make peace with Elabiad, using his “hands-on” approach. But he avoided trial by apologizing in court, paying a fine and submitting to six months of supervision.

Right city, wrong airport: Continental Airlines pilots misjudged the location of Corpus Christi International Airport in Texas and landed a Boeing 737 on a World War II-era landing strip 4 1/2 miles away, the Associated Press reported in May. No one was hurt, but the 59 passengers reportedly waited almost three hours to be bused from long-abandoned Cabaniss Field to the right airport. Nine-year-old passenger Stephen Godfrey wasn’t fooled for a minute. “The runway was all cracked, not as smooth as the airport runway we usually land on. It looked funny, and it was bumpy,” he reported.

Speaking of precocious kids: A 12-year-old boy walked through Miami airport security in May, boarded an American Airlines plane and flew first-class to Jamaica without a plane ticket, money or ID, his lawyer claimed. The boy allegedly walked out of a children’s care center, hopped aboard public transport and went through airport security with no one checking for a ticket or passport. The boy then joined a passenger line and was ushered to a first-class seat, according to the attorney. It was only when he landed and tried to get to the Sandals resort that he was found out and flown home.

Fowl play: The FAA tests the strength of airplane windshields by firing chicken carcasses at them with a special gun to simulate the impact of a real bird in flight, according to a report in Feathers, a poultry trade publication. But when British officials borrowed the gun to test a train’s windshield, the glass broke. When the British asked the FAA what had gone wrong, it was suggested that they thaw the chicken first next time.

Potted pilot: A vengeful ex-wife of a pilot baked marijuana into rye bread and fed it to him, causing him to fail a drug test in 1994 and be fired by Continental Airlines, the airline charged in a lawsuit filed in January. Although “there were no incidents associated with the flights he was on,” an airline spokeswoman said, Continental charged that Deborah Loeding’s baking spree endangered passengers. William Loeding was reinstated in 1996.

Dubious Press Releases

But only if they’re cute: “Many business travelers never leave a hotel room without taking the little soaps and bottles of shampoo or lotion that the housekeeper provides every day. But according to a recent survey by Homewood Suites hotels, what business travelers really want to take home are the housekeepers themselves.”

Los Angeles moves to Paris: “Centrally located in Paris, the Paris Marriott Hotel Champs-Elysees is the only hotel directly on the Champs-Elysees. . . . You will find the Disney Store, Virgin Mega Store and the Planet Hollywood restaurant all in the same block as the hotel.”

If they wouldn’t insult us, we’d visit more: “LOVE THOSE GRINGOS . . . Of 1.9 million overall visitors to Rio in a recent survey, 120,000 were from North America.”

Helpful hint of the year: “The Royal Garden in Kowloon, Hong Kong, advises that while eating chicken feet, duck tongue and frog ovaries, never stick your chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice as this rude gesture is a reminder of the way rice is offered to the dead.”

Watch your fingers: “Mall of America’s 1.2-million-gallon aquarium UnderWater World will make a big splash to celebrate their First Anniversary. Guests will enjoy hands-on experience with baby sharks at UnderWater World’s fully stocked shark petting pool.”

Spending to save: An apartment booking service in London called “In the English Manner Ltd.” offered a morning shopping excursion featuring the V IV M fashion store, which it says stands for “Value for Money.” The tour price: $465 per couple.

Sorry we missed this: “A sculpture cast in bronze called the ‘Spirit of Duty Free’ representing the contribution that Duty-Free Shopping has made to international commerce will . . . be unveiled in early June.”--news release on Shannon Airport in Ireland.

BYOH (Bring Your Own Heat): Among the Icelandair packages announced for travel to Iceland were “Take Your Valentine on a Lover’s Holiday” (from $399) and “Shop ‘til You Drop at the Top of the World” (from $385).

Engle is an editor in the Travel section. Christopher Reynolds is on vacation.