Nate’s Job Corps

Imagine the flurry of correspondence set off by Wednesday’s headline: “Holden Hires 2 Casualties of Limits: Termed-out Mike Hernandez and Rudy Svorinich Jr. land jobs. The news comes as a surprise to Svorinich.”

To: Nate

From: Rudy

RE: You shouldn’t have

You could have knocked me over with a trowel the other day when that reporter from The Times called and told me I was back on the city payroll. I’m tickled that you want to pay me to advise you on transportation. You should appreciate my expertise, since you chaired the City Council’s Transportation Committee before I did. Which makes me wonder why--well, never mind; how much was that consulting fee again? Let me get my tomatoes in and take the kids to the beach, and I’ll be there. For now, here’s some billable advice: Plant early. Wear sun screen.

To: Nate

From: Mike H.

RE: Thanks, thanks, thanks

I said before that I was counting the days until my term was over, but you’re right, being termed out is a time of panic. I mean, we’ve only had since 1993, when the voters approved term limits, to see this coming. I’ve had my problems in the past, but thanks to the kind of man you are--the kind who’s so generous with public money--I won’t go cold and hungry. And neither should you, my man, when you’re termed out in two years. I believe in karma, don’t you?

To: Nate

From: Rita and Mike F.

RE: What about us???

Hey, we’re out of office too. Are we going to have to get real jobs?

To: Nate

From: Dick

RE: Bargain rates!

Now that I’m out of the mayor’s office, I kind of miss being a politician. You have any more openings? I’ll be back from bicycling in France soon. And forget that $3,800-a-month salary you’re handing each of the other guys. For $1 a year, Los Angeles can have me back.